{"product_id":"swing-for-the-retarded-t-shirt","title":"Swing For The Retarded T-Shirt","description":"\u003ch2\u003eThe Lore\u003c\/h2\u003e \u003cp\u003eCaptures the peak \u003cstrong\u003e1982 charity golf tournament\u003c\/strong\u003e aesthetic when committee merchandise lived in absolute blissful ignorance of future linguistic evolution. That specific dusty azure blue against buttercream base triggers instant recognition of early 80s organizational event swag (back when graphic designers worked with three-color screen printing budgets). Wearing this proves you appreciate the jarring collision between innocent vintage Americana and modern sensitivities. For those who collect cursed historical artifacts and understand why certain charity tournament shirts became legendary meme fodder decades later.\u003c\/p\u003e  \u003ch2\u003eThe Specs\u003c\/h2\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBase:\u003c\/strong\u003e \u003cstrong\u003eComfort Colors 1717\u003c\/strong\u003e is The gold standard for vintage vibes with garment-dyed softness that normally takes years to break in.\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e Heavyweight 207 GSM (6.10 oz) 100% Ring-Spun USA-Grown Cotton.\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePrint Tech:\u003c\/strong\u003e Next-Gen DTFlex—a specialized cold-peel transfer that delivers \u003cstrong\u003eultra-vibrant, crack-resistant\u003c\/strong\u003e graphics with superior stretch and a smooth, modern matte finish.\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFeel:\u003c\/strong\u003e Print flexes without cracking like a preserved museum piece. Hangs with the substantial weight of someone carrying decades of linguistic evolution in cotton form. Breathes easy through uncomfortable conversations and awkward recognition moments.\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Relaxed fit with a structured feel—thick and substantial without being stiff. Pre-shrunk and garment-dyed. True to size.\u003c\/p\u003e  \u003ch2\u003eThe Trust\u003c\/h2\u003e \u003cp\u003eOEKO-TEX® 100 · WRAP Certified · US Cotton Trust Protocol · \u003cstrong\u003eZero-Crack HD Print\u003c\/strong\u003e · \u003cstrong\u003eSweatshop-Free Production (US\/EU)\u003c\/strong\u003e · Made-to-Order (Zero Overproduction)\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eRating:\u003c\/strong\u003e R · Dark-Ironic · Adult Only\u003c\/p\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eVisual Accessibility:\u003c\/strong\u003e Mimicking 1980s organizational event apparel, this vintage-inspired graphic sits on a pale buttercream backdrop. A monochromatic dusty azure blue illustration depicts a stylized golf driver and stippled ball on a tee (accented by cool grey shading). Bold, rounded text reads \"Swing for the Retarded\" and \"June 6th, 1982,\" anchored by \"COMMITTEE MEMBER\" in heavy slab-serif type at the bottom.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Shirtwascash","offers":[{"title":"Granite \/ S","offer_id":67622240190575,"sku":"1079903_17655","price":29.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Granite \/ M","offer_id":67622240223343,"sku":"1079903_17656","price":29.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Granite \/ L","offer_id":67622240256111,"sku":"1079903_17657","price":29.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Granite \/ XL","offer_id":67622240288879,"sku":"1079903_17658","price":29.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Granite \/ 2XL","offer_id":67622240321647,"sku":"1079903_17659","price":31.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Granite \/ 3XL","offer_id":67622240354415,"sku":"1079903_17660","price":34.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Granite \/ 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